Tag Archives: health

Mummy in Mourning

28 Feb

Now that I have got over myself and made you aware that I am pregnant again it seems like I have 37 weeks worth of banal comments to share with you. I will avoid this as best I can but there are a couple of things that have given me pause for thought and made me wish I was blogging to share.

I go to a lovely toddler class run by an ex-midwife most weeks. Its a really chilled out class that the bambina loves and is frequented by a lot of 2nd time Mums. Over time I’ve got chatting to one lady imparticular (we’ll call her Jill) who has a 3 year old girl and a 6 month old little boy. She’s one of those people who you almost know you’ll get on with on sight and she’s kept a bit of an eye on me during my pregnancy.

4/5 months in to my (very much planned) pregnancy I had a bit of a wobble you see. I suddenly realised that it wouldn’t just be me and my little girl anymore. (Not to exclude my lovely hubby but just to be honest about how I feel). I was sad for me and I was sad for her; She would now have to share me when all my focus, attention and love had been on her for the best part of two years. Rationally I knew it would be ok, that I would love no 2 just as much as no 1 and that I would make sure my first born felt just as important as she always had but…the thoughts were there in the back of my head and were inclined to make me weepy mid “mummy cuddle”.

Jill had me figured out straight away. She said that whilst she’d been pregnant second time round she had become an emotional wreck that her other half really struggled to manage. She was “in mourning” for her relationship with her little girl. Her phrase. And would frequently burst in to tears at the prospect of what she had done to her family, her daughter and herself. In comparison I have been relatively sane. The tears have been sporadic at best and I couldn’t promise that I wouldn’t occasionally have a quiet weep at my lovely daughter pregnant or not. So in short her honesty made me feel a lot better, and a lot more normal.

It was only last week that I realised what Jill described was really quite serious stuff in her case and actually translated into post natal depression after she had her little boy. The revelation that in the car on the way home from hospital after having her little boy she told her husband that she “loved one of her children and not the other” was the start of a struggle to bond with her 2nd born that she’s now more than over but needed midwife intervention.

So where does this leave me and my head. As the pregnancy has progressed I’ve realised that I will miss just having one baby girl, but I am also so very lucky to be adding another little girl to my family. As time has gone on I know for sure that i’ve got more than enough love to go round.

Sippy Cup to Beaker?

22 Jun

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Alongside my ongoing concern that the babe should be using cutlery, I am now thinking that I should be thinking of moving her onto an open cup. She discarded her bottle at 12 months and has happily used a hard spout sippy cup for all her drinks ever since. She is however taking more or more interest in drinking from my cup or mug and I have always been led by her so ….

Amusingly, her attempts to drink from mummy’s cup are, whilst successful, more like lapping than drinking. In the manner of a small dog!

The Doidy Cup may just make all this easier and is recommended by all the Amazon Mum’s out there. I’ll give it a go and report back.

I am however aware that the babe will reach these milestones in her own time, whether or not I stress about it. Motherhood – easier said than done.

Chicken Pox Party – are you kidding?

6 May

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I just about have time to blog between putting the babe down to bed very early and the hubby arriving back from the football. The babe doesn’t normally get her head down for another 45 mins but she was falling asleep on me during Charlie & Lola so I elected to call it early. The hubby will no doubt be a little forlorn (bad result) and a little drunk (having been out since half eleven) so best to blog now me thinks!

I’ve struggled to blog for the last couple of days as the babe has been unable to go to the childminder with a v high temperature and a mystery illness. I have assumed teething but I am now starting to get the fear. I think it’s Chicken Pox. Having spent a lovely bank holiday Sunday with our best buddies I am especially worried as the rash has just appeared tonight so I may have infected our favourite girls.

This brings me to my point. Will said lovely friend and her equally lovely little girl be thrilled to understand that the babe has chicken pox thus getting the disease out of the way in its mildest childhood form or be swearing at me as soon as I put down the phone at having caused further distress and pandemonium in her already full to bursting life. This is where the very real notion of a “Pox Party” comes in. Apparently it is customary in some parts to spread the virus amongst young children as quickly as possible to get it out of the way.

As mentioned above I realise the virus is often at its mildest in early childhood but this is by no means guaranteed. I also struggle with the idea of intentionally making the babe miserable. My precious girl is just too precious to inflict suffering on her intentionally. And I’m really not a soft Mum, honest.

Going back to my mate, my mind is already turning to the reality of managing the babe with hugely infectious virus requiring her to be house bound, alongside my working week, the hubby’s working week away from home and the childminder being unable to take her. Going to be a new level of juggling. But when it comes down to it, I’ll be here with her every step of the way – because at least to me, that’s what being a Mum is about.

NB. For those looking for a fashionable note, the pic is of the babe in her latest Zara tee. I’m not a huge fan of slogan tops but the spots and neon had me sold. Still available at http://www.zara.com in 3-24 months. Seems ironic now that it’s spotty…..

Sleep Is For the Weak

2 May

Well it finally happened – the babe didn’t cry when I dropped her at the childminder! Its only been 8 long weeks in the making but it’s happened eventually.

To say that my child has an expressive face is putting it kindly. She has a scowl like nobody else I know and she doesn’t need to be able to talk yet as her eyes tell it all. When I left her this morning she sat quickly down on the floor with her little mates, looked back at me, scowled, turned back and carried on playing. Well its better than the screamy ab dabs I suppose. Bless her, i’m so glad she’s adjusting but I guess its all part of her ongoing independence.

The main focus of this week has actually been more to do with sleep than play. The more mobile the babe has got, the more reluctant she is to lie down in her cot. The sleep bag does not stop her from doing laps and trying to grab things that are in striking distance through the bars. (Last week she had managed to reach:- her toothbrush, a snotty muslin, an additional blanket and a mole cuddly toy…). All this has meant that she is taking a lot longer to settle herself and she is occasionally waking early to start her laps again. This has coincided with my concern that her sleep bag is getting a bit on the small side. Its officially up to 18months but at 13 she is filling it up. I personally hate sleeping in a sleeping bag as I am a self confessed wriggler and get all tangled up. As the babe has wriggled since the womb I thought the same might apply to her and made the switch to a baby duvet.

I anticipated trouble but after a night of kicking the duvet off and me getting up every half an hour to make sure her covers were on, she has decided she likes it. When I went through this morning I was greeted by a very cheeky baby grin from under one corner of a big white duvet. Very cute. I also figure that when she does move to a bed I may have a little bit less of a transition to cope with. One can but hope.

I also wanted to post some baby fashion ideas today as there has been a significant drop in purchases since the middle of April. This is partly due to a lack of available cash and part due to being caught up in trying to buy a new house. (For those who follow my blog, I have today been informed that the vendor has accepted another offer on my dream home as she can’t be bothered to do any more negotiating! Gutted).

One of my favourite online retailers La Redoute are in sale and I managed to pick up a few things for the babe. A lot of this stuff comes in baby and girls sizes so worth a look if you have an under 13.

First a gorgeous jumper. I’ve bought a few for her over the winter and they are lovely quality and wash well.

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Girls Pink Jumper

Next a gorgeous little leggings and jersey dress set which will be an ideal transition from spring to summer. Plus I am a big fan of love hearts!

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Love Heart Jersey Set

Finally I have added, perhaps predictably, some little summer pumps down to £7 in the sale. They come in loads of different colour ways and sizes and might be nice in the summer with shorts and socks.

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Canvas Pumps with Bow

Potty for the Potty

24 Apr

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I had to write a post today to detail the mildly concerning and highly amusing events of yesterday. Not all mothers would find these events amusing I must assure you, but on balance I find you have to see the funny side or you’re stuffed.

I am not a blogger who likes to write about her child’s bowel movements in detail. I write about baby fashion and working Mum‘s but sometimes sh*t just happens. (Sorry about that).

So, the babe, she is a determined little thing and she is currently determined only to do a number 2 whilst on her thrown. We started using a potty when she was about 11 months. (Not out of any desire to win the potty training competition I must add). She had various issues going to the loo and my Mum suggested she might find it easier to go if she was sitting. The prescribed Movicol hadn’t had much effect so I gave it a go, and it worked. 3 months on she goes on the potty a couple of times a day, very rarely resorting to her nappy for a no 2.

However, we were out for lunch on Sunday with some mates. In hindsight it was fortunate that these were mates that were longstanding and also had young children of their own. Despite having purchased a travel potty the previous week I had neglected to bring it with me, confident that if she really neeeded to go – she would in her nappy.

She was no sooner in her highchair than I saw the telltale signs that she needed to go. I held her, cajoled her, took her to the changing room to take her nappy off to see if that helped but all to no avail. On taking her back into the relatively swanky gastro pub her cries started up again and my hubby suggested I just hold her over the loo. Nice. Amazingly it very quickly worked and we good rid of the offending issue. Sadly Mummy’s lovely beef and yorkshire pudding was stone cold. A small price to pay for a happy babe.

The second incident may have some reaching for the phone to call social services but hopefully will raise a chuckle too. The babe has recently graduated to a slightly larger pot to accomodate her growing behind. We went upstairs yesterday lunchtime and all was going to plan until I left the room to grab some wipes. The rooms are next door and the danger of accident I felt limited but no so. I re-entered the bathroom just in time to see her toppling sideways mid bowel movement onto the lino. Whether the subsequent screams were as a result of injury caused through the fall or the poo itself is hard to say. However the engineers from Sky fitting our multiroom in the bedroom were no doubt left unsure of what was going on. Bless her. She now has a lovely purple bruise on her cheekbone which I feel the need to explain to everyyone I meet lest they be concerned.

I am genuinely pleased that we have found a way of making the whole issue of going to the toilet easier for her. Lesson for the week seems to be to remember the travel potty, you never know when the mood might strike…

Ps. The potty photo isn’t the babe but the below is. Showcasing her baby Zara jeans and her new found stair climbing skills…nightmare!

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